Tuesday 30 September 2014

PLASTIC EAR

It’s been a peculiar year. Up and downs. I’ve done a few talks, some more successful than others. Sold a few books. The N.E.C. in Birmingham was a minor triumph also my talk at the Seattle Hotel in Brighton Marina. Tuesday is my Skype to an audience in Edinburgh, who would have just watched Cathy Come Home, for a Q\A session then on Saturday off to Barnet to sell a few books, photos and CD’s.

But apart from the above, it seems the rest of my time has been going to hospitals. Firstly it’s been my left eye which was diagnosed  as having a condition called Macular Degeneration. The treatment sounds horrific, they have inject a needle into my eye. That hasn’t, and it’s not over yet, been great fun.

Secondly. in my left ear there appears to be a small Triffid that seems to have taken up residence.

Off I go to the Dermatology Clinic.

‘Yes.‘ they say examining my ear. ‘It’s a Keratoacanthoma, a Scaphoid Fossa in your Pina.’ 
‘What??’
‘You’ll need a skin graft.’
‘Oh.‘sounds nasty.
‘We’ll take the replacement skin from you neck.’
‘Why? Why don’t you take off my bum, there’s more fat down there? The needle won’t hurt as much.’
‘No, the neck skin will match the colour tone in your ear.’


Match the colour tone in my ear! Who cares? I certainly don’t care if the tone is red or pink. Just get rid of that bloody Triffid!         

1 comment:

  1. Good luck with the treatment Ray. The joys of getting older are manifold aren't they?
    It's either bits dropping off or others attaching themselves! Having had cataracts removed, I recall how unpleasant those injections are.

    I haven't heard of that ear condition, but at least they can do something about it, so I hope all goes well. Glad you are managing to keep your sense of humour through it all.

    All the best x

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